Did you break a Commandment today? You might have
Personalizing (some of) the Ten Commandments
Do not steal.
Do not lie.
Do not cheat.
Do not murder.
Do not commit adultery.
These ‘Thou-shalt-nots’ from the Ten Commandments1 might cause you to think that they don’t really apply to you.
Hey, I’m doing pretty well, after all, look at how many of the commandments I’m following! I don’t do any of those things. I’ve got this covered, I’m doing really well, because, you see, I could be doing…so much worse!
Well, I have some sobering news. I don’t think you’ll get a gold star or even a bronze medal. Because how often do these things you’re not supposed to do, really tempt you? On a daily basis are you inclined to steal? Lie? Cheat? These wrongs are so large that we think they don’t apply to our daily lives.
In the spiritual language of Judaism, temptations are not globalized, they’re individualized. Let’s discover what this means for you.
In my last post, What to do about the voice inside your head, I mentioned the Yetzer HaRa2. In Hebrew, an inclination is called the Yetzer, and the Yetzer HaRa, is an inclination to not live up to your highest self. In that post, I promised to share more tools for self-discovery. So let’s delve a bit more into the Yetzer HaRa.
It’s a given that you’re not tempted by the same things I am, so therefore, certain situations don’t pose the same challenge for all people.
To illustrate: let’s take the extreme example of theft, the “Do not steal” commandment.
I can walk past jewelry store after jewelry store and not be tempted to abscond with any jewels or watches, or plot how I might return in the dark of night to commit a heist. Yet, there are plenty of people for whom the glittering, beckoning objects would be a huge temptation.
So, should I feel good that I didn’t cave to that temptation?
So perhaps that commandment doesn’t apply to me, right? I can just check that one off. Not stealing? A cinch! Wow, that was easy!
Well, I can’t give myself credit for averting that pitfall, because it was not a real temptation for me. However, the commandments are for us to live by3, so they must be applicable to all of us.
This means I need to personalize the injunction more. What will actually tempt me to go astray, off the straight path, will be custom-made for me, and the universe will put exactly those obstacles in my path4.
The very personal way that stealing might be an issue for me is: arriving late to an appointment (stealing someone’s time), not telling the cashier there was an error in the store’s favor (stealing money), not mentioning the person who assisted me in an event (stealing someone’s honor), or not footnoting a source in one of my posts (stealing someone’s efforts)…and on and on.
Your challenges will be those that specifically you need to overcome in order to fulfill your potential. Right now, you might not even recognize what these are.
First, you need to engage in some self-discovery.
The work of finding out what they are for you is essential if you are to be on the path of spiritual development.
Here are some questions to get you started:
What situations tend to trip you up?
What really, really annoys you?
What are you avoiding?
In what ways have these challenges been a pattern for you?
Your responses to these questions will get you started, but just focus on one challenge that you face. It’s important to select only one at this time.
This first step of being aware and identifying obstacles is very empowering. You will become more sensitized to the situations in your life and your responses to them. You might devote one week to simply noting and observing, and doing this on a regular basis will provide you insight and inner strength.
From there, you can develop strategies to work on.
Literally, the Ten Utterances / Aseret HaDibrot.
The Yetzer HaRa is traditionally defined as the ‘evil inclination’ or tendency to to toward negative impulses. I prefer to think of it as a challenge to be my best self. Otherwise, I can dismiss the word evil as not being applicable to me. For me, what works is moving toward a better state rather than putting energy into rejection of the ‘lesser me’.
Leviticus / Vayikra 18:5
It turns out, stealing is not where my challenges lie. They lie elsewhere, and having that increased awareness is key to being able to work on them.